Ask The Curmudgeon

What To Do When Your Mother-in-Law is Nuts

DEAR CURMUDGEON: I want to start off by saying my mother-in-law is CRAZY. I don't mean that loosely, either. My husband and I have been married for over five years now, and she still, to this day, hates me. That isn't the part that bothers me, though. What rankles most is the fact that she assaulted me while I was pregnant. She punched my stomach several times, tried to put out a cigarette on my face ... you name it, the woman did it. Unfortunately, my other child and husband were witnesses, not something I would have wanted any child to see. I told her, then, that over my dead body would she ever see my children again. My husband agreed. Now I feel like there is a cloud hanging over my head called "psycho." I am receiving therapy for this, but I still have anxiety attacks. I don't feel one bit sorry for telling her she is not allowed around my children, and I am excited about the fact that we're moving out of state. I just have fears that she is going to do something before we leave town to get at one of the kids. She has already approached us in the middle of a store, at which time I quickly picked the kids up, stuck them in the cart and walked off. I don't feel I'm wrong for taking my children away from that woman. Is mine a normal reaction? Do you think I should suck it up and get on with my life?

DEAR WIMPY MEALY MOUTHED IDIOT MARRIED TO A FUCKING PUSSY OF A HUSBAND: Let me get this straight. She punched you in your pregnant gut and tried to burn you - along with other things you didn't mention - and your husband and other kid saw this happen and he didn't do shit??? What...THEE...fuck!?!?

First of all, your pussy of a husband should have escorted the bitch out the door. By her hair with a foot up her ass hopefully, but out the door nonetheless, while stating in no uncertain terms that she isn't welcome any more anywhere near you or the kids. What a fucking bitch!

Now since pussy-ass hubby didn't do a gawddam thing about the shit she pulled, you should have fixed her fucking wagon. Maybe not until you delivered, but one way or the other, you should have made it quite clear you weren't going to put up with her shit. The next time you saw her, you should have greeted her with nothing less than a baseball bat to the teeth, or better yet, a loaded gun.

Forget that shit about you seeing a therapist. The only thing you need a therapist for is figure out why you're such a weak human being. Sad part is, I can tell by your letter that your children are going to grow up to be little fucking sissies just like you and their other mother candy-assed daddy.
The only cloud hanging over your head right now should be a looming, dark cloud of regret for sticking with a shithead husband who obviously doesn't have the 'nads to stick up for his pregnant wife when she needed his strength and support to kick the crazy bitch the fuck out of everyone's life.
And you. YOU! What the fuck are you taking this shit upon yourself for? It's her fault. She's the nut. How stupid are you to not see that?

Fuck sakes. [spit]




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