"Obama's An Idiot" is where my political bitches now live. Go ye thereto and read.

Wednesday, September 05, 2007

A Short Course In Creative Writing

Judy, a professional genealogical researcher, discovered that Hillary Clinton's great-great uncle, Remus Rodham, a fellow lacking in character, was hanged for horse stealing and train robbery in Montana in 1889.

The only known photograph of Remus shows him standing on the gallows. On the back of the picture is this inscription: "Remus Rodham; horse thief, sent to Montana Territorial Prison 1885, escaped 1887, robbed the Montana Flyer six times. Caught by Pinkerton detectives, convicted and hanged in 1889."

Judy e-mailed Hillary Clinton for comments. Hillary's staff of professional image adjusters cropped Remus's picture, scanned it, enlarged the image, and edited it with image processing software so all that's seen is a head shot.

The accompanying biographical sketch is as follows: "Remus Rodham was a famous cowboy in the Montana Territory. His business empire grew to include acquisition of valuable equestrian assets and intimate dealings with the Montana railroad. Beginning in 1883, he devoted several years of his life to service at a government facility, finally taking leave to resume his dealings with the railroad. In 1887, he was a key player in a vital investigation run by the renowned Pinkerton Detective Agency. In 1889, Remus passed away during an important civic function held in his honor when the platform upon which he was standing collapsed."

And THAT is how it's done folks!



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5 comments:

SK said...

Perfect! I really need to practice this stuff....

curmudgeon said...

It's a jewel!

Ima Wurdibitsch said...

Wow. I'd heard of spin. I thought I understood spin. I'd never seen it so beautifully demonstrated until today.

I need someone to spin how getting married in high school and being twice married to losers is a good thing.

curmudgeon said...

Something like, "Beginning the experience early, _______ has obtained many years of extremely diverse experience in the matrimonial business> This has resulted in gaining a vast store of knowledge with which to impart ..."

Blah blah blah...

Ima Wurdibitsch said...

Nice... I may have to work on my own personal spin.