"Obama's An Idiot" is where my political bitches now live. Go ye thereto and read.

Friday, January 02, 2009

It's That Time of the Year

Fark's 2008 Headline of the Year Contest

Headline of the Year: Five killed and dozens injured in perfume factory fire. EAU DE HUMANITY
(submitter: Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener)

Runner-up: "Spam King" sentenced to 47 months of having his inbox filled with unsolicited male
(submitter: slim pickens)


Sports tab Headline of the Year: After hours of squealing and grunting, a sweaty Maria Sharapova finally licks Ana Ivanovic Down Under
(submitter: I_Approve_Of_This_Message)

Runner-up: One armed swimmer nearly completes swimming the English Channel until someone waves at him
(submitter: daveinaz)


Geek tab Headline of the Year: Scientists create rubber that repairs itself. Your parents wish they had had this
(submitter: GoGoGo)

Runner-up: Three steps to get drugs out of your drinking water. Cool, but what do we do with all the leftover water?
(submitter: time2sow)


Showbiz tab Headline of the Year: George Takei to marry long term partner. Wedding planner sets phasers to stunning
(submitter: Taleya)

Runner-up: Queen guitarist Brian May completes his doctoral thesis in astrophysics, proving link between rotation of the Earth and human females with ample gluteal regions
(submitter: Cordwainer Deathbird)


Politics tab Headline of the Year: "Obama tax plan will retard growth, job creation" as opposed to Palin's plan of job growth and retard creation
(submitter: Schadenfreude ist die schoenste Freude)

Runner-up: Alaska's black population says he has felt ignored by Palin
(submitter: cfffffgagffacfacfacfacfacccccfcaaffff)


Business tab Headline of the Year: Toyota recalls 90,000 of 90,001 Highlanders for obvious reason
(submitter: NetOwl)

Runner-up: Blind CEO first to lead blind organization. The only things he can't do are A) drive a car, B) fly an airplane and C)
(submitter: Sique)

Pun/Wordplay Headline of the Year: Harsh winters drive away all but heartiest birds. Won't somebody please think of the chilled wren?
(submitter: wegro froestu)

Runner-up: Man dies in monkey attack as primates tear him into rhesus pieces
(submitter: 40below)
They crack me the hell up, they do.


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2 comments:

Anonymous said...

It is indeed a strange world.

curmudgeon said...

Absolutely!