"Obama's An Idiot" is where my political bitches now live. Go ye thereto and read.

Thursday, December 13, 2007

Ask The Curmudgeon

DEAR CURMUDGEON: I met and married the man of my dreams four years ago. Both of us were in our 40s, and obviously we each had a past. I was honest about mine; he said he just didn't remember things. After we married he remembered a few things . . . such as having sex with two women at the same time. I told him I found that disgusting. When he saw how shocked I was, he didn't tell me anything else.

Because he had a child from a previous relationship, his ex would call to talk about "Susie," and the conversation invariably turned to when they were together. She informed me that he'd had sex with her and some of her friends at the same time. When I confronted him, he fessed up. I asked if I knew any of the other girls. He stated no.

A few years passed and we ran into a guy he pretended not to remember. Come to find out not only was this guy involved in some of the "group activities," but he was also one of his good friends. He promised he would never lie to me again.

Just last week I was informed that a friend was moving next door with his girlfriend. I asked my husband if he knew the girl. He stated no. Come to find out she was a girl who was part of the "group."

What am I to do? He says he just wants to forget about these episodes, that they keep getting brought up and it's not fair to him. Well, excuse me, but I am the one being lied to and I am the one not wanting to be put in situations where I am in a roomful of people who've all had sex with my husband.

I don't think I can get past it. I believe a person's sexual preference does not change. Am I wrong?

Didn't remember? BWAHHAHAH!!! That's a hoot! Didn't remember. Now I don't care who y'are, tha's funny.

Believe me I would remember a threesome (or more) no matter how fucked up I was. I mean, gee whiz. Boinking on several wimmen at once? That's like every young guys dream come ... uh, I'm not helping much am I.

So he was out porking other wimmen years ago. Big fucking deal. What sort of prude are you anyway? He did it before you married his ass, right? Good gawd. I fucked other wimmen before I got married to Mrs Curmudgeon. That's life. People should be more worried about their spouse not fucking other people before getting hitched. Chances are they have other issues.

And obviously, the dude and his girlfriend moving next door says it all. They both want to crawl in the sack with you and hubby. Fucking DUH!!!
Just take some pictures and send them to me. All will be well. I can sell them and make some money, and even give you a cut if you like.



The British Bird. said...

I dunno, sounds like a lot of fun to me! Only draw back is im suprised he still has a "Mr Happy" to do anything with. Someone should tell him, you cannot do that anymore and not expect your dick and other assorted important bits to fall off...

curmudgeon said...

No doubt. Too many weird bugs going around.

Miss Sassy said...

I like how this came right back to you. I'll agree to leave it in the past, but I've been in a room with a bunch of people my guy had slept with - I don't blame her for wanting to know it there is anyone left on the block that can't tell better sex stories about her hubby than she can.
Get HBO, invite the lot to watch Real Sex, act out, repeat until you get off your high horse =)

curmudgeon said...

Good idea! Then everyone will know everyone fucked everyone too!