"Obama's An Idiot" is where my political bitches now live. Go ye thereto and read.

Friday, October 31, 2008

Tricky Treat!

So as I was leaving the dentist's office Wednesday after getting my head drilled, his parting words were "Be sure and buy lots of candy for the trick or treaters, keep me in business."
Gave me a chuckle it did.

So with that, I went to get the goodies for the little bastards last night, and after the cashier scanned the sixth 3 pound bag of goodies, she pointed to the 'Oh wait, I need one of those' piles they have at the register - you know, the little things they try to upsell and add to your purchase when they're all done scanning your cart full. She points and says "Are you sure you don't need one more?"
Hah friggin' hah. The bitch doesn't know it, but I get so many of the little shits coming by that I may still run out.

See, I don't want to be out scrubbing eggs off the house and cars, nor do I want to remove toilet paper from the trees or shrubs. So I do like every other homeowner in a decent yet ungated neighborhood and stock up on the cavity inducing insurance policy for the neighborhood kids, as well as the carloads of mexican kids who come from neighborhoods where parents don't dare walk at night, let alone allow their kids to walk. This way, I don't have to do anything the next day but gather up the decorations I myself have put out without worrying about getting 'tricked'.

So there you have it. I have the treats bought, I will pick up my adult 'treats' on the way home, and Mrs Curmudgeon and I will park our asses on the lawn chairs in the driveway and give away 'free' shit to all the little kiddies (many of which are teenagers) who grace us with their presence.



Mark said...

Thanks to the overabundance of soccer moms in the area, most of whom are afraid to let their precious little snowflakes wander the very safe streets of Maricopa at night looking for handouts, we need not even bother waiting for kids to show by. Plus, there's the deal last year where I would greet them at the door nude. I think news of my "treat" made the rounds. Bummer that.


curmudgeon said...

That's probably why the UPS guy just leaves the packages at the door without knocking too.

The British Bird. said...

I was a true curmudgeon, turned the porch light off and laid on the sofa horizontal watching ghost hunters.

no eggs or tp, the little sods were hardly able to make it up the porch steps they had such a haul by the time they got to our house, I didnt think it was worth buying it, besides I cant eat it, so there! :-)

curmudgeon said...

That's okay I suppose. They probably just thought a pervert lived there. ;)

The British Bird. said...

Its me!! New blog, please change my URL..what can I say, I got bored and wanted a new toy..

The British Bird.

curmudgeon said...

Looks goo so far!