"Obama's An Idiot" is where my political bitches now live. Go ye thereto and read.

Wednesday, October 18, 2006

A Big Thank-You!

Via email:
Dear Mr. Ex President Clinton:

I recently saw a bumper sticker that said, "Thank me, I voted for Clinton-Gore." So, I sat down and reflected on that, and I am sending my "Thank you" for what you have done, specifically:

1. Thank you for introducing us to Jennifer Flowers, Paula Jones, Monica Lewinsky, Dolly Kyle Browning, Kathleen Willey, and Juanita Broderick. Did I leave anyone out?

2. Thank you for teaching my 8 year old about oral sex. I had really planned to wait until he was a little older to discuss it with him, but now he knows more about it than I did as a senior in college.

3. Thank you for showing us that sexual harassment in the work place (especially the White House) and on the job is OK, and all you have to know is what the meaning of "is" is. It really is great to know that certain sexual act s are not sex, and one person may have sex while the other one does NOT have sex.

4. Thank you for reintroducing the concept of impeachment to a new generation and demonstrating that the ridiculous plot of the movie "Wag the Dog" could be plausible after all.

5. Thanks for making Jimmy Carter look competent, Gerald Ford look graceful, Richard Nixon look honest, Lyndon Johnson look truthful, and John Kennedy look moral.

6. Thank you for the 73 House and Senate witnesses who have pled the 5th Amendment and 17 witnesses who have fled the country to avoid testifying about Democratic campaign fund raising.

7. Thank you, for the 19 charges, 8 convictions, and 4 imprisonment's from the Whitewater "mess" and the 55 criminal charges and 32 criminal convictions (so far) in the other "Clinton" scandals.

8. Thanks also for reducing our military by half, "gutting" much of our foreign policy, and flying all over the world on "vacations" carefully disguised as necessary trips.

9 Thank you, also, for "finding" millions of dollars (I really didn't need it in the first place, and I can't think of a more deserving group of recipients for my hard-earned tax dollars) for all of your globe-trotting. I understand you, the family and your cronies have logged in more time aboard Air Force One than any other administration.

10. Now that you've left the White House, thanks for the 140 pardons of convicted felons and indicted felons-in-exile. We will love to have them rejoin society (Not to mention the scores you pardoned while Governor of Arkansas).

11. Thanks also for removing the White House silverware. I'm sure that Laura Bush didn't like the pattern anyway. Also, enjoy the housewarming gifts you've received from your "friends."

12. Thanks to you and your staff in the West Wing of the White House for vandalizing and destroying government property on t he way out. I also appre ciate removing all of that excess weight (China, silverware, linen, towels, ash trays, soap, pens, magnetic compass, flight manuals, etc.) out of Air Force 1. The weight savings means burning less fuel, thus less tax dollars spent on jet fuel. Thank you!

13. And finally, please ensure that Hillary enjoys the $8 million dollar advance for her "tell-all" book and you, Bill, the $10 million advance for your memoirs. Who says crime doesn't pay!

14. The last and most important point - thank you for forcing Israel to let Mohammed Atta go free. Terrorist pilot Mohammed Atta blew up a bus in Israel in 1986. The Israelis captured, tried and imprisoned him. As part of the Oslo agreement with the Palestinians in 1993, Israel had to agree to release so-called "political prisoners". However, the Israelis would not release any with blood on thei r hands. The American President at the time, Bill Clinton, and his Secretary of State, Warren Christopher, "insisted" that all prisoners be released. Thus, Mohammed Atta was freed and eventually thanked the US by flying an airplane into Tower One of the World Trade Center. This was reported by many of the American TV networks at the time that the terrorists were first identified. It was censored in the US from all later reports. Why shouldn't Americans know the real truth?

What a guy!!

Also, please pass along a special thank you to Al Gore for "inventing" the Internet, without which I would not be able to send this wonderful, factual e-mail.

On top of that, Hillary Rodham Clinton, as a New York State Senator, now comes under the "Congressional Retirement and Staffing Plan," which means that even if she never gets reelected, she STILL receives her Congressional salary until she dies (Would it not be nice if all Americans were pension eligible after only 4 years?).

If Bill outlives her, he then inherits HER salary until HE dies. He is already getting his Presidential salary until he dies. If Hillary outlives Bill, she also gets HIS salary until she dies. Guess who pays for that?

WE DO!

It's common knowledge that in order for her to establish NY residency, they purchased a million dollar-plus house in upscale Chappaqua, New York. Makes sense. They are entitled to Secret Service protection for life. Still makes sense.

Here is where it becomes interesting. Their mortgage payments hover at around $10,000 per month. BUT, an extra residence HAD to be built within the acreage to house the Secret Servic e agents.

The Clintons charge the Federal government $10,000 monthly rent for the use of that extra residence, which is just about equal to their mortgage payment. This means that we, the taxpayers, are paying the Clinton's salary, mortgage, transportation, safety and security, as well as the salaries for their 12 man staff -- and, this is all perfectly legal!

16 comments:

shoes said...

all that and hes still better than bush...........what a guy

curmudgeon said...

What exactly is the color of the sky on your planet?
Or is it the medication? If it is the medication, maybe you have some to share?

Anonymous said...

all that and he's barely better than Carter.

curmudgeon said...

Which ain't saying much, if anything.

Anonymous said...

Blessed be the medication that we share with our fellow man.

Hint, hint.

shoes said...

. Thank you for introducing us to Jennifer Flowers, Paula Jones, Monica Lewinsky, Dolly Kyle Browning, Kathleen Willey, and Juanita Broderick. Did I leave anyone out?

thanks mr bush for introducing us to haliburton, 2783 dead soldiers, nine billion missing dollars, no stem cell research...etc. did i miss anything

2. Thank you for teaching my 8 year old about oral sex. I had really planned to wait until he was a little older to discuss it with him, but now he knows more about it than I did as a senior in college.

thank you for me having to explain to my 10 year old how these men are dying because we didnt give them the right equipment in a war we cant win....the b.j. pails by comparison

3. Thank you for showing us that sexual harassment in the work place (especially the White House) and on the job is OK, and all you have to know is what the meaning of "is" is. It really is great to know that certain sexual act s are not sex, and one person may have sex while the other one does NOT have sex

thanks for showing us that 9 billion given to haliburton can just disappear .... and nobody cares in your administration.

4. Thank you for reintroducing the concept of impeachment to a new generation and demonstrating that the ridiculous plot of the movie "Wag the Dog" could be plausible after all.

thank you for showing kids that disagreeing with anything the government says is bad. dont stand up for anything. become sheeple

5. Thanks for making Jimmy Carter look competent, Gerald Ford look graceful, Richard Nixon look honest, Lyndon Johnson look truthful, and John Kennedy look moral.

ditto

6. Thank you for the 73 House and Senate witnesses who have pled the 5th Amendment and 17 witnesses who have fled the country to avoid testifying about Democratic campaign fund raising.

thanks for abramoff. speaking of shady fundraising

7. Thank you, for the 19 charges, 8 convictions, and 4 imprisonment's from the Whitewater "mess" and the 55 criminal charges and 32 criminal convictions (so far) in the other "Clinton" scandals.

thanks for the convictions and resignations of the republicans you've backed. i'm sure the convictions will pile up as time goes by

8. Thanks also for reducing our military by half, "gutting" much of our foreign policy, and flying all over the world on "vacations" carefully disguised as necessary trips.

thanks for sending our soldiers to war without the proper equipment causing even more to die than should have

9 Thank you, also, for "finding" millions of dollars (I really didn't need it in the first place, and I can't think of a more deserving group of recipients for my hard-earned tax dollars) for all of your globe-trotting. I understand you, the family and your cronies have logged in more time aboard Air Force One than any other administration.

thanks for taking more vacation time than any other president. thanks for giving tax breaks to rich oil companies (i couldnt think of more worthy people to get my hard earned money)

10. Now that you've left the White House, thanks for the 140 pardons of convicted felons and indicted felons-in-exile. We will love to have them rejoin society (Not to mention the scores you pardoned while Governor of Arkansas).

thanks for just ignoring the 9 billion missing dollars, or covering for pedophiles, or putting a friend in charge and ruining new orleans

13. And finally, please ensure that Hillary enjoys the $8 million dollar advance for her "tell-all" book and you, Bill, the $10 million advance for your memoirs. Who says crime doesn't pay!

your dad wrote a book and you will to. you'll get a big advance like every other president has.

14. The last and most important point - thank you for forcing Israel to let Mohammed Atta go free. Terrorist pilot Mohammed Atta blew up a bus in Israel in 1986. The Israelis captured, tried and imprisoned him. As part of the Oslo agreement with the Palestinians in 1993, Israel had to agree to release so-called "political prisoners". However, the Israelis would not release any with blood on thei r hands. The American President at the time, Bill Clinton, and his Secretary of State, Warren Christopher, "insisted" that all prisoners be released. Thus, Mohammed Atta was freed and eventually thanked the US by flying an airplane into Tower One of the World Trade Center. This was reported by many of the American TV networks at the time that the terrorists were first identified. It was censored in the US from all later reports. Why shouldn't Americans know the real truth

thanks for ignoring all the info the clinton administration gave you and allowing terrorists to fly into the towers. of course it did allow you to attack a country that hada nothing to do with it while holding hands with the country that backs the terrorists. well done mister preesident




this is just to show that they all have their vices. i'll take a president getting blown in the oval office over a president that fuckin me and the country right in the pooper every time

Anonymous said...

Liar!

"thank you for me having to explain to my 10 year old how these men are dying because we didnt give them the right equipment in a war we cant win..."

Clinton downsized the military and slashed spending on defense. You know not what you speak, dolt.

Why not explain to your son why the democrats would rather see our military fail in Iraq, so that they can win the house and the senate? Explain that one Sir!

curmudgeon said...

If this anonymous is the same anonymous as in the other then comments, DAMN! Sounds like we're like minded unless it's about music.

Anyway,
"thanks mr bush for introducing us to haliburton, 2783 dead soldiers, nine billion missing dollars, no stem cell research...etc. did i miss anything"

How about the fact that there have been no attacks on the American continent, and no genocide under Saddam's rule since we've been there and kicked his ass out of office and killed two of his most treacherous aides - his sons.

"thank you for me having to explain to my 10 year old how these men are dying because we didnt give them the right equipment in a war we cant win....the b.j. pails by comparison"

You and other like minded dems would rather see the American military lose the war, just so you could say "Ha! Told you so!" than see anything positive come from it.
I can see it now "Yes son, Bush is all but killing our young men and women. It's all his fault. It's all about the OOOIIIIIILLLLL!!!!!"

You know? Fuck it. Some people get ideas in their head, and that's it. It's a waste of my time to go on about it. The data is out there if anoyone cares to look past the liberal media or the left wing blogs.

Anonymous said...

same anonymous. :)

Pooke said...

Shit, shoes... here we go again. Yes, I'm willing to go around again with you because you are one funny SOB... who knows, maybe at some point we will agree with each other on SOMETHING.

But, first, of all you do an awful lot of finger pointing at HALLIBURTON!! Damn evil bastards. But during the Kosovo "occupation" (which still exists, btw), who did Clinton call? No, it wasn't Ghostbusters. Bottom line is there are VERY few companies who will go into harms way to feed our troops, provide portajohns, and put their lives on the line for rebuilding in war-torn areas. Nonwithstanding that the evil Dick Cheney severed all ties and sold all stock in Halliburton before swearing into office. He stands to land NOT A DIME from the Halliburton contracts, so quit bitching about people willing to do things you or I wouldn't.

(As some of you might suspect, I have a soft spot for private contractors willing to put themselves in harms way that are not ideolligically tied to a damn thing and are just trying to help a fledgeling democracy, but I digress).

Then you said:
thanks mr bush for introducing us to haliburton, 2783 dead soldiers, nine billion missing dollars, no stem cell research...etc. did i miss anything and to which I respond:

You certainly did! You forgot Karl Rove's complicity in remotely detonating the twin towers, Dick Cheney's role in blowing up the Pentagon, and the fact that Al-Queda is a made up myth of a threat, all contrived by the Bushies to control something or another. Yeah, thats it. Probably the UNOCAL pipeline dreamed up by Mikey Moore during the CLINTON administration.

God I could continue. Okay it's frustrating and just plain stupid, but I will.

Your casualty numbers really hit home. Since I have personally adopted many of these soldiers, I won't dignify your stats with a response in respect of the families. And believe me, every one lost hurts. But it really besmirches their memory to use their lives as ammunition in a propaganda war. (Don't tell me this is also a myth. It exists large and well).

I will however, dignify a response about embryonic stem cell research. Now, I don't know if you have someone close to that you think will benefit from this. That I would consider justified. When it's your own, of course you want evrything possible to help them. And if it were one of my family, and I thought it were the only way, maybe I would feel that way too. But as of now, I haven't seen anything done with embryonic stem cells that can't be done with adult or umbillical cells. If you have any proof that destroying an embryo, even one instance, helped one person, post it here and maybe you'll convince me.

Right now, with the exception of the last argument, so much of what you purport just sounds more like the same pile of muck flung by the rankandfile of left-wing propagandists, Daily Krap, Democrap Undersewage, etc.

Sorry, Dave. I didn't mean to rant, I'm just having a bad day.

shoes said...

i'm sorry pooke that your bad day makes your arguements ok and mine bad. face the facts people ... we cant win in iraq. its not the fault of the military. sure they werent given the right equipment but its more than that. why do you think his dad didnt go into baghdad. he knew we couldnt occupy that country. as for the arguement that the terrorist strikes stopped after we invaded iraq...well...thats bizzarre thinking. we havent had any since we invaded afghanistan either. most of the terrorists from 9-11 were from saudi arabia. we should have went after them but no they are friends of the bush family. sorry i quoted actual figures of war dead. if you could use those numbers to show bush in a favorable light you wouldhave but because you cant you say i'm besmirching their memory. if not for this adfministration sending those men and women over there without the right equipment alot of them would still be alive....not memories. its the same argiement that republicans use when they say everyone who doesnt agree is a bad american. this was a bad war...a bad decision, and we are mired there now (just like vietnam).

shoes said...

oh and by the way if your afraid to write your name then dont come in as anonymous.....just dont post at all pussy

curmudgeon said...

Pooke,
"...at some point we will agree with each other on SOMETHING."
Mighty odd, but every once in a while, shoes and I even agree on something. There is hope for you.
And I don't mind at all you coming here and 'ranting'.

Pooke said...

Actually, his dad didn't go into Baghdad because he succummed to pressure exerted by the UN. And I don't think you can compare Iraq to Vietnam. Not only are the numbers nowhere near what they were during Vietnam (3,000 vs. 58,000 casualties), but the reasons for entering the two conflicts are very different. The one comparison we can make, however, is the media's influence. After the Tet offensive, Vietnam was bascially won militarily, but public opinion was being shaped by a large left wing upsurge at home, forcing Congress to cut off funding in the face of political pressure. After we left, South Vietnam continued the fight and had many military successes until we cut off funding to them as well, marching their populace to slaughter.

Don't get me wrong. I think the contingency planning for an insurgency of this size was poor at best, or more likely, non-existent. But I'm not going to bash Bush for making the decision he did. Face it, the UN IS a useless debating society, and their ineffectiveness after 13 months and endless resolutions left him with a decision. Take a chance that Sadaam Hussein was on the up-and-up, or play it safe. We knew they had used WMD before, and we knew he was training ideologues to blow themselves up in Israel and the Palestinian territories. There was also intelligence that pointed to a top Al-Queda leader meeting with him in Iraq. So he was faced with that, and coupled with the idealistic opportunity to transform the ME, I still believe he did what he thought was best for our security. Were it you, what would you have done?

Unfortunately, in war, things don't always go according to plan.

One thing we do know, however, is that if we are to pull out now that country would dissolve into complete chaos, fomenting the exact conditions awarded Al Queda in Afghanistan, and allow them to regroup along with their Al-Queda In Iraq counterparts. After the progress we've made in dissecting their factions and cutting off their funding, I think it would be foolish to allow this to happen.

Do I think we're safer? Yeh, a little, not because of Iraq but because we are taking important steps in finding them before they get the chance to cream me next time I'm riding the subway or travelling through the Holland Tunnel. But I think the only time we will ever be completely safe from terrorism is when they are all dead. Meanwhile, if we can create conditions that would make them think twice about an ideology mired in blood, that is a start. It's not going to be easy by any means and definately won't happen overnight, but lets face it, this conflict started 30 years ago and came to a crescendo on 9/11. It's not going to end any time soon.

shoes said...

the u.n. had nothing to do with his dad going in to baghdad. they can use that but the truth was that if you went in and got saddam you had to put someone in to take his place...and we are not prepared for that. nature abhors a vaccuum. secondly, you can compare iraq to vietnam easily. the vietnamese and the iraqis are completely different than the people our fathers fought in the second world war. those people lived the way we do basically...they had homes and families...etc. the vietnamese and the iraqis live in mud or grass huts. a million dollar bomb does $100 in damage. they dont want to be americanzed. they want to live by the old testament as shown in iran, saudi arabia...hell all those countries. yes saddam did drop chemical weapons on his own people but there is no eveidence that he had wmd's on a large scale or that he was planning to use them on the u.s. he was too busy fighting with iran and by us taking him out have made iran a much stronger enemy. we didnt have to worry about the iranians getting nuclear weapons because iraq wouldnt have allowed it. they would have teated them on iraq first and saddam knew that. after all the work we've done to stop the insurgents? we havent done anything. they are as strong as ever. short of killing everyone you cant stop them. this isnt a knock on our military. the insurgents dress like regular citizens. they are guerrillas. they dont fight fair while we make our men fight fair. as for throwing that region into chaos...too late, it already is in chaos. if we are safer today (and i think we are) its because we went after afgahnistan first. that was al queda's stronghold. you cannot win a war against religion. you cant make illogical people think straight. the only way to completely wipe out the terrorists is to kill them all...every single man woman and child (that way you dont miss any). the english have broken up some really bad terrorist cells without use of the army...just good old police work. thats where our money should be spent. actually, if truth be told, our money should be spent giving every muslim boy free internet access, a free lifetime subscription to playboy, free coca cola for life. nobody wants to blow themselves up when they are sitting their ass getting fat while jerking off to computer porn. you dont see good red-blooded american boys blowing themselves up. nobody can trigger a bomb with a handful of vaseline

Anonymous said...

My photo = my opinion of this thread.