A Fable

So apparently, back in the day, there was an escaped slave who somehow managed to come upon a lion who had a thorn stuck in its paw.
The lion, rather than attack the slave, instead presented the sore and swollen paw to the slave. The slave took a look at the paw and seeing that it was all sore and swollen, commenced to pluck out the thorn.
Well, the lion was ever so grateful, and never forgot the kind deed.

Which, would be an ever better story if you substitue a "husband" for "lion", "wife" for "slave", "ass crack" for "paw", and "zit" for "thorn".

Just sayin' is all.