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Thursday, June 16, 2005

This Day in History - Miranda

This Day in History:
1966 The Miranda rights are established

The Supreme Court hands down its decision in Miranda v. Arizona, establishing the principle that all criminal suspects must be advised of their rights before interrogation.
Ah. The Miranda. Where countless boogy-men have walked because they didn't have a simple phrase quoted to them. Sweet.

Revised Miranda:
You have the right to swing first. However, if you do choose to swing first, I have the right to kick the shit out of you.
You have the right to have a priest and a doctor present at the time of the ass-kicking.
If you cannot afford a doctor or are not presently attending a church of your choice one will be appointed for you. Do you understand what I have just told you, ASSHOLE?

3 comments:

I'm not even supposed to be here today said...

I like the revisions!

shoes said...

dont forget the right to bleed profusely

curmudgeon said...

If the interrogation is performed properly, there may be no external bleeding. :)