The Good, The Bad, The Stupid

Are they going to kill me or not?

Cellphones may protect brain from Alzheimer's

2 hrs 45 mins ago Sent 1,014 times

WASHINGTON (Reuters) - A study in mice suggests using cellphones may help prevent some of the brain-wasting effects of Alzheimer's disease, U.S. researchers said on Wednesday.
[...]

First they cause cancer, then they don't, then they do, then they prevent Alzheimer's, what's next?
Are they going to cure AIDS or give me AIDS?
Are they going to cause tuberculosis or prevent it?

How about you 'study'ers just shut the fuck up.

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Electric Pizz Cutter?

Okay then.
Look. If I order a pizza from somewhere (no, I ain't going to waste the time and energy to make one by hand when there are 400 pizza delivery joints around) and your pizza is so tough I need a saw to cut it, you're going to be making another trip to my house, refund in hand.



More useless gadgets here. Although I do disagree
with the inclusion of the "Set it and forget it."
That thing is a wonderful contraption, and it gets much use at our household.

Don't knock it 'til you try it.


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You've Coma A Long Way Baby

Obama signs equal-pay bill
WASHINGTON – President Barack Obama signed an equal-pay bill into law Thursday before cheering labor and women leaders who fought hard for it and the woman whose history-making lawsuit gave impetus to the cause.
[...]

Good job, dear. Now where's my supper?

Next thing you know, they'll be putting a man on the moon.


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Burst My Bubble

So there is some good news in the midst of this housing kerfuffle going on around us. Sure, home prices were ridiculously high there for a while, builders couldn't keep up with demand, and pre-existing home sales were off the hizzy. Now, people can't unload their overpriced homes, can't make the payments, and are getting foreclosed on right and left. Plenty of homes on the market.

Which, since new construction has all but come to a standstill, many wetbacks illegal immigrants are going back to Mexico. So who says they weren't here for the money? Who says they were here just to make a better life for themselves? Hmmm.

Well, with all that, there is plenty to look forward to. For starters, we should now have shorter wait times in the emergency room. There won't be as many uninsured patients to wait on so taxes for indigent care should go down. Not to mention insurance rates. There won't be as many uninsured motorists on the road.

Schools could save money by eliminating "English as a second language" courses and reassign teachers to more useful classes, like Spanish. (B'yuk!).

More jobs will be available for residents, which can do nothing but help the economy.

Businesses won't have to worry about printing two languages on all their signage and labeling.

Wow! The list could go on forever! But I'll not get my hopes up just yet. There's still a long way to go to bring things back to normal.

REMEMBER THE ALAMO!!!



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Huh?

U.S. military loses records for bin Laden's driver

Thu Feb 7, 10:04 PM ET

GANTANAMO BAY U.S. NAVAL BASE, Cuba (Reuters) - The U.S. military has lost a year's worth of records describing the Guantanamo confinement of Osama bin Laden's driver, a prosecutor said at the Yemeni captive's war court hearing on Thursday.
[...]

Is it just me or does that seem a bit too convenient?

I can't see shoehorning the entire "U.S. Military" into this particular shoe. Someone, somewhere may have destroyed them, but this is a typical libtard media spin trying to trash the military once again. Fuckers.




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Yummy

Cops break door, nab alleged pizza thief

Thu Nov 29, 11:29 PM ET

EASTPOINTE, Mich. - Police used a battering ram to break down an apartment door and arrest a woman they say grabbed food from a pizza delivery man but failed to pay him.
[...]

Damn! That must have been some good pizza!




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Interesting

Cambodia and Vietnam to build cross-border golf course
Reuters - 2 hours, 59 minutes ago

PHNOM PENH (Reuters) - Cambodia and Vietnam are going to build a $100 million (49.2 million pounds) golf course straddling their border in a region heavily bombed by U.S. forces in their anti-communist war in the 1960s and 70s, officials said on Wednesday.
[...]

I don't really give a shit about the political ramifications or the fact that these commie countries are sort of making some type of peace to build a golf course.

What's notable about it is this. The part where they said "heavily bombed". Can you imagine the plethora of bunkers on that thing?

Sounds like a rather challenging course to me.


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From The "No Shit!" Files

Yet another useless study:

Why people have sex: It feels good

AP - 2 hours, 57 minutes ago Sent 716 times

WASHINGTON - After exhaustively compiling a list of the 237 reasons why people have sex, researchers found that young men and women get intimate for mostly the same motivations. It's more about lust in the body than a love connection in the heart.
[...]

Good gawd people. Get a life!

Do you honestly think the so-called "young men and women" are fucking because they want kids?

Quit wasting money on this shit and do something useful.



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A Fart In The Wind

NAACP symbolically buries N-word

AP - Mon Jul 9, 5:34 PM ET

DETROIT - There was no mourning at this funeral. Hundreds of onlookers cheered Monday afternoon as the NAACP put to rest a long-standing expression of racism by holding a public burial for the N-word during its annual convention.
[...]

"Today we're not just burying the N-word, we're taking it out of our spirit," said Detroit Mayor Kwame Kilpatrick. "We gather burying all the things that go with the N-word. We have to bury the 'pimps' and the 'hos' that go with it."
[...]

What a fucking joke.

Save for the occasional idiot, no 'Crackers' I know are using that sort of language any more. This bullshit symbolism is nothing more than lip service to keep these phony phukkers employed. They thrive on racism to keep themselves employed. I haven't seen them do anything useful since oh, about the 60's.





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Well Now. Ain't That A Kick In The Nuts

Apparently, some good actually came out of Larry King's interview with the ex-con:

Michael Moore Bumped for Paris Hilton Interview

[...]
It turns out that "Sicko" propagandist Moore had to be bumped so Larry could do some jail time talking with "The Simple Life" star.
[...]

I'm sure that made his day.




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What A Sleighload Of Horse Shit

Va. School's No-Contact Rule Is a Touchy Subject


By Maria Glod
Washington Post Staff Writer
Monday, June 18, 2007; B01

Fairfax County middle school student Hal Beaulieu hopped up from his lunch table one day a few months ago, sat next to his girlfriend and slipped his arm around her shoulder. That landed him a trip to the school office.

Among his crimes: hugging.

All touching -- not only fighting or inappropriate touching -- is against the rules at Kilmer Middle School in Vienna. Hand-holding, handshakes and high-fives? Banned. The rule has been conveyed to students this way: "NO PHYSICAL CONTACT!!!!!"
[...]

What, THEE, Fuck?!?! Are these people for real? I may be an old fart, but back in my day...

C'mon now, you should know me better than that. I'm not going to pull that shit.

Suffice it to say though that this overprotective, P.C., "Everyone's a winner" bullshit is getting waaaaay out of hand.

What's a school without sneaking a little hand holding in the bleachers during the ball game?
Or what sort of 'guy' stuff is supposed to happen if teammates can't do a "high-five" after a nice shot or a T.D.?
Not to mention, "knuckles" - you know, try to smack the other guy's knuckles with your own before he can pull his had away?

That shit is all banned at this moron school.

Maybe those dumb fucks should talk to "Michael Jackson's Personal Bubble Supplier to the Stars" and see if they can get an enclosure for each student. Physically bar them from even accidently bumping into each other. Gawd forbid Billy's elbow accidentally touches Sally's tit walking down the hallway. Or little Johnny were to spontaneously slap Bart on the back for telling a funny joke.





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Dads And Grads. Dads And Grads. Dads And Grads.

Fuck you and your 'Dads And Grads'! I'm getting fucking sick of hearing 'Dads And Grads'.

[parrot voice]
'Dads And Grads'. 'Dads And Grads'.
[/parrot voice]

KAAAAAAAAAACK!

Look. You should have a "Dad's" day. Great idea. To most people, fathers are worth respecting and honoring.
You should also be proud and celebrate the fact your child graduated high school, college, whateverthefuck. Just don't lump them together for the sake of a ridiculous rhyme which you think is cute, in trying to lure suckers to purchasing your wares.
You will definitely turn me off to your shit.




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Hitlary's Theme

So I hear Hitlary has some sort of contest going where folks can vote for a song she can use for her (ugh, I hate to even think it) presidential campaign.

As an aside though, I must get this off my chest. How can anyone in their right mind vote for that fucking bitch. I mean, good gawd. After all the shit she's pulled, and all the shit she allowed her dear ex-president hubby to pull while he was prez, how can anyone think she would be a good leader for this country?
Now some folks say they would never vote for a person based on ... what? Skin color? Religion?
I won't vote for Obama - not because he's black, but because like Hitlary, he's an idiot. Others won't vote for him because he's black.
Some won't vote for Romney because he's mormon. Catholics don't have such a good reputation either. Not many people think much of the baptists that have been president either. So far, he doesn't have my vote because I don't know shit about him. But his religion won't deter me.

Anyway, here are the round one results for the bitch's theme song:

* Suddenly I See - KT Tunstall
* Rock This Country! - Shania Twain
* Beautiful Day - U2
* Get Ready - The Temptations
* I'm a Believer - Smash Mouth
Top Write-In Suggestions:
* Are You Gonna Go My Way - Lenny Kravitz
* Ain't No Stoppin' Us Now - McFadden & Whitehead
* Every Little Thing She Does Is Magic - The Police
* You and I - Celine Dion
* The Best - Tina Turner

Nice to see so many America-hating canuks' songs there.

Here are a few suggestions I think more fitting:

"Witchy Woman" - Eagles
"The Bitch is Back" - Elton John
"I'm a Loser" - The Beatles
"Baby Got Back" - Sir Mix-A-Lot
"Lies" - Fleetwood Mac
"Fuck You Like An Animal" - Nine Inch Nails
"Liar" - Three Dog Night
"Loser" - Beck
"Stand By Your Man" - Tammy Wynette
"You've Got A Lot Of Nerve" - Bob Dylan
"American Idiot" - Greenday
"Killer Queen" - Queen
"Lonesome Loser" - Little River Band.
"Cold Hard Bitch" - Jet
"It's Cryin Time Again" - Ray Charles
"Your Cheatin Heart" - Hank Williams Sr.
"Down with a Sickness" - Disturbed
"Crazy" - Patsy Cline
"Evil Woman" - ELO
"Lying Eyes" - The Eagles
"Devil Woman" - Cliff Richards
"Super Freak" - Rick James

The list could go on forever I suppose, but those are some of my favorites.

What are your choices?



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You May Be Interested...

... to know that according to Google Analytics, of all the visits to this humble little speed bump on the information highway, none - not a single one - came from Montana, Wyoming, North Dakota, West Virginia, Connecticut, Vermont or Delaware.

Poor bastards have no clue as to what they're missing out on.




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Stuff You Just Can't Make Up

Ripped from the headlines:

• Panty-clad man tries robbery with lighter AP - Thu May 10, 10:58 PM ET

  INWOOD, W.Va. - A thief covered his face with a pair of blue women's underwear and used a pistol-shaped cigarette lighter in a botched robbery of a convenience store, police said. "I couldn't make this stuff up if I tried," State Police Sgt. T.C. Kearns told The Journal in Martinsburg.

• Armless, one-legged driver leads chase AP - Thu May 10, 6:19 PM ET

  NEW PORT RICHEY, Fla. - Authorities were led on a high speed vehicle chase by an armless, one-legged man, and they said this wasn't the first time the 40-year-old eluded police.

• German man found after 7 years dead in bed Reuters - 1 hour, 25 minutes ago

  BERLIN (Reuters) - The decomposed corpse of a German man was found alone in his bed after nearly seven years, police in the western city of Essen said Thursday.

• Executed man gets last meal wish after he dies Reuters - Thu May 10, 2:26 PM ET

  NASHVILLE, Tennessee (Reuters) - A convicted murderer put to death in Tennessee this week got his last meal wish after he died.

I just don't have anything to add to these. The stories write themselves.




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Okay, It's Your Turn Now

So you fucked up democrats were bitching up a storm last year around this time. As I recall, there was a ton of squawking at Bush and his oil prices - which were pushing $3 per gallon.

Well, y'all were bragging about all the changes needed and how you were going to make them, then you dun won the elections and took the majority. But yet, gas prices are waaaaaaaayyyyyy higher than last year so far and are still going up. And if the trend holds, they are going to go up even more when school gets out and people start vacationing for the summer.

So I have a question: What the fuck?



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E-Fucking-Zactly

As you know, I've been mentioning "D" a time or two. He goes by "Pick" most of the time, so that's what I'll refer to him here as.

In one of his notes I replied to, I asked if he minded me posting some of an email he sent. His reply:

"One of the reasons that make it worth strapping on bro...freedom of speech. Feel free to post anything you want that doesn't m bear ass you for knowing me"

M bare ass? Far from it. Damn proud to have you as a bud, Pick. I'm thinking up the recipe (home brew request) as we speak.

So with that I'll post a bit of news he sent:

[...]
The whole place is tucked into what is pretty much downtown Kabul, a pretty large city. I'd say similar to Denver. We are very secure, as just down the block is the presidential palace, various embassies, the International Security Force Afghanistan, etc. So there is pretty much an entire army of President Karzi's handpicked troops guarding us. I would say that in the 2 minute shuttle ride from the Safe houses to Camp Eggers you pass 5 checkpoints, are negotiating barriers the entire time, and pass maybe 200 armed soldiers. Very, very secure. Eggers itself is surrounded by a 20 something foot wall, and that's where the US forces take over with machine guns and tanks all over. And everyone is armed.

The safe houses are basically mansions that have been taken over by the various "foreign" militaries here. There are maybe 10 housing US troops, all in a one block area. This whole area is also patrolled by the same group of soldiers, with extremely controlled entry and is surrounded by a very high wall with razor wire on top. We are so safe that the only time we have to wear the body armour and have our weapons loaded is during the shuttle ride. At the safe houses and Camp Eggers you can take it off. I would estimate that each house is 6 to 8 bedroom and very nice with all the comforts of home, including cable tv and wireless internet access. So after I learn more I'll hopefully be able to hook up the laptop at "home".

I took a "pass" on the Driving training, as I had promised a certain blue eyed/red haired beauty to stay safe, so have no desire to leave the secure area and drive around. I saw all I need to see on the drive up from Bagram. The country is dry and mountainous, and we saw lots of Bedouin camps with their goats and camels. The city is chaotic as it digs itself out of the last 50 decades of Soviet then Taliban rule, with limited running water and electricity. Many of their buildings were destroyed in the wars and are still in ruins. Traffic is an absolute nightmare and I want nothing to do with it.

The Afghans themselves are simply overjoyed that we are here. We freed them from the Taliban which were pretty much hated by all, have maintained a very light hand and let them establish their own government, and pumped an enoumous amount of money into the country. They are very cordial and friendly...eager to be of any help they can. They have an old school way of making you feel welcome, preffering to chat and have tea before even thinking about getting down to bussiness. It's kinda charming, and I'm actually very impressed.

The fighting that remains in the Country is all concentrated down-south in the Kandahar area, the stronghold of al queda and the Talaban. The ease of hitting with an ied or sniper then slipping across the paki border is making life difficult. There are random, standoff attacks on coalition forces, but no pinched fire fights to speak of. The Afghans themselves are the only ones that get in that kind of fight, and they always win. The "spring offensive" is all a media hyped frenzy, and has developed into absolutely nothing.

So basically I've decided that I'm not here to fight anybody, I'm here to help a friend stand up. I think that is the attitude of everyone I work with. We maintain a very vigilant state, but the only real concerns are the very, very rare ied or suicide bomber.

How's that for a paper? Hah don't remember when I've rambled so much. But I hope it puts your mind at some ease, because I know the "not knowing" is the hard part.

And of course while I miss everyone terribly, I am still very glad that I am here and doing my small part to empower these people and let democracy shine. Their's is an old, old culture and they deserve a break.

[...]

That's the news so far. Now, if you have a minute and want to say 'Hello' to Pick, send an email to the address in my profile and I'll hand out his addy. I don't want spammers to go gabbing it, so I'll not post it here.





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Even More Easter Shit

The pope also wishes you a Happy Easter!






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More Easter Shit

Peeps: I hate them. They're disgusting.

But they do make nice apparel:








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Rudy Giuliani

I've never had much of an opinion one way or the other about Rudy. In fact, I had never heard his name until 9/11, and of course he grabbed the spotlight and held on to it as long as he possibly could - just like every other mayor would have done in his shoes.

But if Ted Rall hates him, he must not be that bad of a candidate. Especially compared to Hitlery.

Enlighten me please.




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