"I am 79 years young"Meh, I ain't into robbing the cradle.
Intelligence not linked to wealth, according to US studyWell, no fucking shit. How many times have I said the same thing?
AFP - Tue Apr 24, 8:23 PM ET Sent 747 times
WASHINGTON (AFP) - Intelligence has nothing to do with wealth, according to a US study published Tuesday which found that people with below average smarts were just as wealthy as those with higher IQ scores.
|1.||an utterly foolish or senseless person.|
|2.||Psychology. a person of the lowest order in a former classification of mental retardation, having a mental age of less than three years old and an intelligence quotient under 25.|
HOW TO START EACH DAY WITH A POSITIVE OUTLOOK
1. Open a new file in your computer.
2. Name it "Hillary Rodham Clinton"
3. Send it to the trash.
4. Empty the trash.
5. Your PC will ask you, "Do you really want to get
rid of Hillary Rodham Clinton?"
6. Firmly Click "Yes."
7. Feel better.
PS: Next week we'll do Nancy Pelosi.
Mock metal group Spinal Tap to reuniteJust what the world needs.
AP - 2 hours, 11 minutes ago Sent 1,591 times
NEW YORK - Spinal Tap is back, and this time the band wants to help save the world from global warming.
Reuters - Mon Apr 23, 3:11 PM ET Sent 110 timesYeah, tell us something we don't already know.
NEW YORK (Reuters Health) - The brain-damaging effects of alcohol strike women more quickly than men, a new study conducted in Russia confirms.
This one is noteworthy because of the sender:From: "Lunacies F. Voltmeter"You sound like quite the electric individual.
Hillary Clinton praises Rutgers teamAfter all the shit that went down last week at V.T., she chose the Sharpton path and went to Rutger's?
By WAYNE PARRY
The Associated Press
NEW BRUNSWICK -- Sen. Hillary Rodham Clinton met Friday with Rutgers women's basketball coach C. Vivian Stringer, and proclaimed that Rutgers "has a chance to be the leader of this teachable moment" on standing up to discrimination and marginalization.
"HEY YOU! C'mon PLAY THE GAME!"she says.
Here's 5 questionsOkay, any of you brave enough to take me on as an interviewer?
1. Do you believe in reincarnation?
No. Who in their right mind would want to be reincarnated? Of all the living things one could possibly come back as, what are the odds you'll come back as something more desirable than say, a fucking cockroach?
And even if you come back as a human, what are the odds you'll come back as a rich King of San-hai-abhar-umbi-waheli or someplace? Yeah, fat chance.
No, the more likely scenario is that you'll come back as an assembly line worker for Nike in China, or a 10 year-old gay prostitute in Thailand.
2. Who's your daddy?
'What Mrs. Curmudgeon hears in the sack' for $1000, Alex.
3. What is our purpose here as humans?
That's deep. Way too deep.
I'm here to enjoy myself and die happy.
Seriously though, believe what you want as far as death, reincarnation, resurrection and "The Hereafter" is concerned, but I think we're here to be the best person we can be to ourselves and other people. The legacy you leave behind is what your memory will consist of.
4. Gold Canyon Candles or Yankee Candles?
I had to google this to even know what you were talking about. Does that answer the question?
5. Are you REALLY a curmudgeon or do you just play one on tv?
I never claim to be something I'm not. ;)
However, sometimes people read me wrong. I ain't really a grump. I'm normally a bit quiet - sometimes deep in thought, or as some would say, in a daze. This gets interpreted many times as sulking.
"One of the reasons that make it worth strapping on bro...freedom of speech. Feel free to post anything you want that doesn't m bear ass you for knowing me"M bare ass? Far from it. Damn proud to have you as a bud, Pick. I'm thinking up the recipe (home brew request) as we speak.
[...]That's the news so far. Now, if you have a minute and want to say 'Hello' to Pick, send an email to the address in my profile and I'll hand out his addy. I don't want spammers to go gabbing it, so I'll not post it here.
The whole place is tucked into what is pretty much downtown Kabul, a pretty large city. I'd say similar to Denver. We are very secure, as just down the block is the presidential palace, various embassies, the International Security Force Afghanistan, etc. So there is pretty much an entire army of President Karzi's handpicked troops guarding us. I would say that in the 2 minute shuttle ride from the Safe houses to Camp Eggers you pass 5 checkpoints, are negotiating barriers the entire time, and pass maybe 200 armed soldiers. Very, very secure. Eggers itself is surrounded by a 20 something foot wall, and that's where the US forces take over with machine guns and tanks all over. And everyone is armed.
The safe houses are basically mansions that have been taken over by the various "foreign" militaries here. There are maybe 10 housing US troops, all in a one block area. This whole area is also patrolled by the same group of soldiers, with extremely controlled entry and is surrounded by a very high wall with razor wire on top. We are so safe that the only time we have to wear the body armour and have our weapons loaded is during the shuttle ride. At the safe houses and Camp Eggers you can take it off. I would estimate that each house is 6 to 8 bedroom and very nice with all the comforts of home, including cable tv and wireless internet access. So after I learn more I'll hopefully be able to hook up the laptop at "home".
I took a "pass" on the Driving training, as I had promised a certain blue eyed/red haired beauty to stay safe, so have no desire to leave the secure area and drive around. I saw all I need to see on the drive up from Bagram. The country is dry and mountainous, and we saw lots of Bedouin camps with their goats and camels. The city is chaotic as it digs itself out of the last 50 decades of Soviet then Taliban rule, with limited running water and electricity. Many of their buildings were destroyed in the wars and are still in ruins. Traffic is an absolute nightmare and I want nothing to do with it.
The Afghans themselves are simply overjoyed that we are here. We freed them from the Taliban which were pretty much hated by all, have maintained a very light hand and let them establish their own government, and pumped an enoumous amount of money into the country. They are very cordial and friendly...eager to be of any help they can. They have an old school way of making you feel welcome, preffering to chat and have tea before even thinking about getting down to bussiness. It's kinda charming, and I'm actually very impressed.
The fighting that remains in the Country is all concentrated down-south in the Kandahar area, the stronghold of al queda and the Talaban. The ease of hitting with an ied or sniper then slipping across the paki border is making life difficult. There are random, standoff attacks on coalition forces, but no pinched fire fights to speak of. The Afghans themselves are the only ones that get in that kind of fight, and they always win. The "spring offensive" is all a media hyped frenzy, and has developed into absolutely nothing.
So basically I've decided that I'm not here to fight anybody, I'm here to help a friend stand up. I think that is the attitude of everyone I work with. We maintain a very vigilant state, but the only real concerns are the very, very rare ied or suicide bomber.
How's that for a paper? Hah don't remember when I've rambled so much. But I hope it puts your mind at some ease, because I know the "not knowing" is the hard part.
And of course while I miss everyone terribly, I am still very glad that I am here and doing my small part to empower these people and let democracy shine. Their's is an old, old culture and they deserve a break.
1. You have to be against capital punishment, but support abortion on demand.
2. You have to believe that businesses create oppression and governments create prosperity.
3. You have to believe that guns in the hands of law-abiding citizens are more of a threat than U.S. nuclear weapons technology in the hands of Iran or Chinese and North Korean communists.
4. You have to believe that there was no art before federal funding.
5. You have to believe that global temperatures are less affected by cyclical changes in the earth's climate and more affected by soccer moms driving SUV's.
6. You have to believe that gender roles are artificial, but being homosexual is natural.
7. You have to believe that the AIDS virus is spread by a lack of federal funding.
8. You have to believe that the same teacher who can't teach 4th- graders how to read is somehow qualified to teach those same kids about sex.
9. You have to believe that hunters don't care about nature, but PETA activists do.
10. You have to believe that self-esteem is more important than actually doing something to earn it.
11. You have to believe that Mel Gibson spent $25 million of his own money to make "The Passion of the Christ" for financial gain only.
12. You have to believe the NRA is bad because it supports certain parts of the Constitution, while the ACLU is good because it supports certain parts of the Constitution.
13. You have to believe that taxes are too low, but ATM fees are too high.
14. You have to believe that Margaret Sanger and Gloria Steinem are more important to American history than Thomas Jefferson, Gen. Robert E. Lee, and Thomas Edison.
15. You have to believe that standardized tests are racist, but racial quotas and set-asides are not.
16. You have to believe that the only reason socialism hasn't worked anywhere it's been tried is because the right people haven't been in charge.
17. You have to believe that homosexual parades displaying drag queens and transvestites should be constitutionally protected, and manger scenes at Christmas should be illegal.
18. You have to believe that this message is a part of a vast, right-wing conspiracy.
GOD BLESS AMERICA!
Oops, can't do that either!
Finally, a definition of globalization I can understand and to which I can relate:So simple.
Question: What is the truest definition of Globalization?
Answer: Princess Diana's death.
Question: How come?
Answer: An English princess with an
Egyptian boyfriend crashes in a
French tunnel, driving a
German car with a
Dutch engine, driven by a
Belgian who was drunk on
Scottish whisky, followed closely by
Italian Paparazzi, on
Japanese motorcycles; treated by an
American doctor, using
This is sent to you by a Canadian, using
American (Bill Gates') technology, and you're probably reading this on your computer, that uses
Taiwanese chips, and a
Korean monitor, assembled by
Bangladeshi workers in a
Singapore plant, transported by
Indian lorry-drivers, hijacked by
Indonesians, unloaded by
Sicilian longshoremen, and trucked to you by
That, my friends, is Globalization!
Belgian firm says speak Dutch or be firedGood gawd. Would I ever love to see Americans say "Speak English or...".
Reuters - 2 hours, 7 minutes ago
BRUSSELS (Reuters) - A Belgian auto parts supplier has forbidden its workers to speak any language other than Dutch, even during their lunch break, and employees could be fired if they disobey.
BORDEAUX, France (Reuters) - Simultaneous explosions occurred overnight in two towns in the southwest of France near the Spanish border, causing some damage to buildings but no casualties, a police source said on Thursday.Get zee cheese! We muzt run for zee life!!!
I'm all over Dave's blog and appreciate the good wishes and ass whooping comments. I'm not able to blog post [snip] , but please pass my thanks and a hearty HOORAA WILL DO.
Serving Proud…Serving Payback
Tom had been in the liquor business for 25 years. Finally, sick of the stress, he quit his job and bought 50 acres of land in Alaska as far from humanity as possible. He saw the postman once a week and got groceries once a month. Otherwise, it was total peace and quiet.
After about six months of almost total isolation, someone knocked on his door. He opened it and a huge, bearded man was standing there.
"Name's Lars, your neighbor from forty miles up the road. Having a party Friday night...thought you might like to come. About 5:00."
"Great", says Tom, "after six months out here I'm ready to meet some local folks. Thank you."
As Lars left, he stopped. "Gotta warn you......be some drinkin'."
"Not a problem" says Tom. "After 25 years in the business, I can drink with the best of 'em."
Again, the big man started to leave and stopped. "More'n likely gonna be some fightin', too."
"Well, I get along with people; I'll be all right. I'll be there. Thanks again."
"More'n likely be some wild sex, too!"
"Now that's really not a problem," says Tom, warming to the idea. "I've been all alone for six months! I'll definitely be there. By the way, what should I wear?"
Don't much matter ..... Just gonna be the two of us."
"I laughed until I cried...and then realized I need a life."
"Here's a question for all the damp, limp, hand-wringing ninnies who think guns should be banned on college campuses. If you were in a classroom with Cho Seung-Hui at the door, trying to force his way in so he could shoot you and eight or nine of your friends, would you want a gun or not?
Airport hits cabbies for refusing faresSimple. Camel fuckers have a choice. Take the job or not. They don't want to haul someone with booze in their possession or on their breath they can go buy a 7-Eleven or a cheap motel. They don't have to drive a cab.
AP - Mon Apr 16, 6:51 PM ET Sent 189 times
MINNEAPOLIS - Taxi drivers who refuse service to travelers carrying alcohol at the Minneapolis-St. Paul International Airport face tougher penalties despite protests from Muslim cabbies who sought a compromise for religious reasons, officials said Monday.
Bar sued over alleged police beatingYeah, that's really going to teach the cops a lesson. "We can go drink at a bar and beat people up. All they'll do is sue the bar!"
1 hour, 56 minutes ago
CHICAGO - Four men who claim they were beaten by off-duty police officers at a Chicago bar sued the establishment, accusing it of serving alcohol to intoxicated officers who "assaulted and battered" them "without provocation."
Tue Apr 10, 5:27 PM ETNice to know that's settled.
NASSAU (Reuters) - A former boyfriend, Larry Birkhead, was identified on Tuesday as the father of Playboy Playmate Anna Nicole Smith's 7-month-old daughter after DNA test results were released by a Bahamas court.
Radio jock Imus suspended for two weeksThe two main arguments I've heard are:
By Arthur Spiegelman 1 hour, 12 minutes ago
LOS ANGELES (Reuters) - Shock jock Don Imus, who has made a career out of outrageous comments, was suspended on Monday for making racist remarks by both the radio and television networks that carry his program.
CBS Radio and MSNBC, which broadcasts the radio show on television, suspended Imus for two weeks for saying the mostly black Rutgers University women's basketball team looked like a bunch of "nappy-headed hos."
Carbon dioxide? You mean the gas - along with water vapor - which is the result of complete combustion?
Automakers challenge Vermont emissions law
By Scott Malone 2 hours, 44 minutes ago
BURLINGTON, Vermont (Reuters) - The U.S. auto industry challenges Vermont in court on Tuesday, trying to block efforts by 10 states adopting stricter limits on vehicle emissions of carbon dioxide, a main greenhouse gas.
Guns at home equal higher suicide risk: studyOnce again, and try to follow along here - I'll speak slowly:
40 minutes ago
WASHINGTON (Reuters) - Suicide rates among people of all ages are higher in states where more homes have guns, U.S. researchers reported on Tuesday.
Cheney accuses Pelosi of "bad behavior" in SyriaI don't know who the fuck she thinks she is, but whatever it is, she ain't.
Cheney harshly criticized Pelosi's visit to
Syria this week and declared in an interview, "The president is the one who conducts foreign policy, not the speaker of the House."
One day last week, a fourth-grade teacher asked the children what their fathers did for a living.
All the typical answers came up:
Lawyer, and so forth.
However, little Justin was being uncharacteristically quiet, so when the teacher prodded him about his father, he replied, "My father's an exotic dancer in a gay cabaret and takes off all his clothes in front of other men and they put money in his underwear. Sometimes, if the offer is really good, he will go home with some guy and stay with him all night for money."
The teacher, obviously shaken by this statement, hurriedly set the other children to work on some math problems and then took little Justin aside to ask him, "Is that really true about your father?"
"No," the boy said,
"He works for the Democratic National Committee and is helping to get Hillary Clinton elected as our next President, but I was too embarrassed to say that in front of the other kids"
New Orleans weighs evacuation plansSo in other words, they're still unprepared, and still don't have a clue.
AP - Wed Apr 4, 9:01 PM ET
NEW ORLEANS - With hurricane season less than two months away and memories of Katrina less than two years old, city leaders are still trying to sort out how they will evacuate residents this year if another storm approaches.
Idaho shooters target National GuardIt's idiots like this that give us responsible gun 'toters' a bad name.
By JOHN MILLER, Associated Press Writer 56 minutes ago
BOISE, Idaho - For years, ATV-riding, gun-toting sport shooters have flouted gun laws in part of Idaho's high desert by taking pot shots at ground squirrels and other animals. Now, officials say, they're also setting their sights on National Guard tanks that train in the area.
Rifles and pistols have been banned in a 68,000-acre area of the Snake River Birds of Prey National Conservation Area since 1996.
But the federal Bureau of Land Management is considering expanding the gun-restricted area by 41,000 acres to try to limit shootings at Idaho Army National Guard troops who report slugs bouncing off their tanks on a regular basis.
3 at Yale accused of burning U.S. flagHuh? Whuzzat? Areested for burning a flag?
Wed Apr 4, 9:01 AM ET
NEW HAVEN, Conn. - Three Yale University students, one a U.S. citizen born in Pakistan, were arrested on charges of setting fire to an American flag hanging outside a home.
...were arrested early Tuesday on charges ranging from reckless endangerment to arson, police said.[giggle] Arrest them for reckless endangerment and arson! I love it!
[...]At that age, I barely knew how to wash my dick. The idea of poking some girl with it would never even have occurred to me.
The students were arrested Tuesday at the Spearsville school in rural north Louisiana, authorities said. Two 11-year-old girls, a 12-year-old boy and a 13-year old boy were charged with obscenity, a felony. An 11-year-old boy, the alleged guard, was charged with being an accessory.
Iran president says to free British sailorsThe Iranis knew they were going to get their ass handed to them eventually, so they made the only decision they could make.
54 minutes ago
TEHRAN (Reuters) - Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad freed 15 British sailors and marines on Wednesday, offering a "gift" to Britain that ended a 13-day crisis which had rattled world financial markets.
Humane Society holds doggie yoga classNow I like dogs. They make good pets. They can even make a good meal. But taking them and doing yoga?
AP - 1 hour, 20 minutes ago
BELLEVUE, Wash. - Beans, a majestic 2-year-old Vizsla, however, is ready to play. The overgrown puppy has tried to relax with his owner, Chantale Anderson, but once Magnet the black lab heads off to explore the room, Beans is ready to go.
Boy's vacuum expertise earns him TV shotUh, yeah. Now that's something to be proud of. Knowing all sorts of shit about vacuums will definitely get him quite far in life I'm sure.
AP - Sat Mar 31, 3:16 PM ET
ADRIAN, Mich. - A 12-year-old boy who has collected more than 150 vacuum cleaners says he is learning to identify them by sound. "I'm getting pretty good at it," Kyle Krichbaum told the Detroit Free Press.
Forecasters predict busy Atlantic hurricane seasonBlah blah blah. Same thing they said last year.
24 minutes ago
MIAMI (Reuters) - The 2007 Atlantic hurricane season will be far more active than usual with an expected 17 tropical storms, of which nine will strengthen into hurricanes, a noted forecasting team founded by Dr. William Gray said on Tuesday.
Grieving couple commits suicide after dog diesAt least we won't have to worry about them driving any more.
Reuters - 1 hour, 41 minutes ago
HYDERABAD, India (Reuters) - Unable to come to terms with the death of their pet dog, an elderly couple in southern India committed suicide by hanging themselves, police said on Monday.
Italian becomes official language ... of ItalyMaybe everyone in America should ... oh, I dunno. Maybe speak english? Just a thought.
Reuters - Fri Mar 30, 12:47 PM ET
ROME (Reuters) - It's official. The language of Italy is Italian -- but not everyone is happy about it.
MINNEAPOLIS - Six Muslim men removed from a plane last fall after being accused of suspicious behavior are suing the airline and threatening to sue the passengers who complained — a move some fear could discourage travelers from speaking up when they see something unusual.Once again, criminals (alledged or not) have more rights than law-abiding citizens.